Dad Life: Work

How To Win Friends At The Office.

I would just like to start off by saying I love where I work and I love my department even more.  I think the people in the logistics cube are downright the best employees at Tip Top. Ok, now with that out of the way, lets get down to business (to defeat… the Huns.)
A couple of weeks ago I learned something invaluable and I wanted to pass it along because I know we could all use more friends in the workplace.  So, forget the golden rule and instead,  jot this little nugget down: Before you call someone a name or shove them in a category, know what said word and or category means.
Let me explain. Our cube, which consists of four people, started talking about sign spinners.  You know who I am talking about, the guys and gals that rock it out with some headphones in their ears dancing the day away flipping around a piece of cardboard so that you can’t read the name of their employer, all to entice you to come into a place of business.  We were talking about sign spinners and one of the guys asked, “What do you even call those guys, spinsters?”
Which I responded, “Woah, don’t call them spinsters, that would be offensive to (lets call her Abby) Abby.” Which Abby then turns to me looking befuddled and shocked… just blinking away.  And I continue on, “Thats what you are right? A spinster?”  As I look around me to see now all three looking shocked, my face starts to flush as I am beginning to realize I have no idea what I just said really means, but I just keep on going.  “Yah, a spinster. Like someone who sews things and creates stuff like jewelry.”
Let’s just say my stupidity was about the only thing saving me at this point because lets be honest, I didn’t use a shovel to dig my potential grave with this one, I used a stinkin backhoe loader, one of those big construction machines.
It turns out the word that slipped my mind was seamstress.  And for those of you who missed the whole bid deal, let me give you the definition of each.
Spinster: A woman who is not married, especially a woman who is no longer young and seems unlikely ever to marry. Which just because Abby is a woman and currently single doesn’t inherently mean that she is a spinster, it just makes me seem like a big jerk.
Seamstress (The word I wish I said): A woman who sews.  Which is what Abby does.
Now, I am sure you can see how I got those words mixed up…right?
Where were we now. Ah yes, my funeral.  Like I said, my stupidity was the only thing that saved me, and the fact that I am not THAT big of a jerk.  Plus, Abby was incredibly gracious and the rest of the team didn’t give me too much grief.
Guys, I am just glad I survived to tell this story and that I could give you all some winning advice on how to win friends at work. In a nutshell: Know the meaning of words and make sure to use them in the right context.

Dad Life: Family

King of Coupons

There is a show called Extreme Couponing which has been on for a handful of years now.  Over all, I think the people who are on that show are a addicted and intense, so pretty much like me or anyone else when it comes to something we are passionate about.  After recently watching an episode though, I thought I would give couponing  a tryout.  Plus, as you know from my eating trash pizza story, I will try almost anything to save a little money.
So I started off by doing what any good couponer would do, steal as many neighbors papersphoto.JPG as possible and GET THOSE COUPONS.  Kidding… I didn’t really grab anyone else’s paper. So I scoured through those free papers that get randomly thrown on my driveway and found halfway decent coupons to all sorts of things from toiletries to restaurants that we would actually go to.  So I grabbed the pages with the coupons I liked and shoved them in a drawer for later use. Yep, thats right, I didn’t even cut the coupons out, I just shoved all the coupons in the drawer, not even in an organized fashion #ProTip.
One of the coupons I came across was to JC Penny for 15% off any item, and I thought I had hit pay dirt because I needed to get a new wallet.  So I grabbed the coupon and headed to the store…or at least I thought I was. It turns out, the store/stores I was thinking of going to get a new wallet were TJ Max and Marshalles.  Yep, I know… not even the same store or near the same area as JC Penny.  To top all of it off, I looked at the coupon again and saw in super fine print that the coupon had already been expired for a couple of weeks #ProTip.
I wish this was the end of it, but it turns out I like to take things to the next level.  A couple of weeks after this coupon fiasco I wanted to try another shot at using coupons.  My wife had these coupons for Pamper diapers and so I headed to Target because they had an amazing deal on diapers.  The deal was that with every box of diapers you purchase, you get $15.oo back.  Well with young kids, as parents know, you always need more diapers, so I head on over to Target and stock up on some diapers.  As I get to the cashier and he rings me up, I notice he isn’t grabbing any of those $15.00 Target gift cards and I tell him about the promotion.  He kindly says he has no idea about this but guest services should be able to help.  I head over to guest services to find out that I only get this $15.00 gift card if I purchase THREE boxes of diapers.  I head back to the diaper aisle with groceries and and cart of diapers in tow, all the while my son is talking very loudly about the cereal we just purchased.  As I look at the promotional sticker on the diaper shelf I find out that low and behold, in small tiny print, that you really do have to buy three boxes of diapers to get the $15 #ProTip.
So for all of you at home, let this King of Coupons break down these #ProTip’s for you.
Pro Tip #1: Don’t bother to actually clip your coupons out. Just shove the whole mess of them unorganized into a drawer.
Pro Tip #2: Grab a specific coupon but make sure that you don’t go to the store that actually honors the coupon and make sure when you would want to use it, that it is expired.
Pro Tip #3:  Don’t read the fine print on coupons, it is highly over rated and a waste of your time.
You… are… welcome.

Dad Life: Family

Ms. Emma Carol Stippichio

Our little girl arrived just over a week ago, June 15th, at 6lbs 9oz and 20inches long.  She is one tiny little nugget, and she is mine.  I already love this girl to pieces and I can’t wait to buy my first gun real soon.

I ended up taking a week off from work to help Lindsay and I must say, I don’t think I really grasped how much work she does with being a stay-at-home mom. I mean wowza.  You get Sam up, change his diaper, feed, clean, play, feed a snack, change more diapers, clean up more, make lunch, clean, put him down for a nap, change some more diapers and maybe his sheets and hopefully you got some rest during his nap because the whole cycle of cleaning, eating, cooking, poop, and everything else starts up again.  It is truly exhausting, and that is with only one kid.  I do not envy the role she plays but I am incredibly grateful for it.  I am thrilled that my kids get to have their mother there with them all the time.
Lindsay, and any mom really, you all are saints.

Dad Life: Kids

From Zero to Hero

Kids are the best…well, most of the time.  They can be some of the best encouragers, and at other times, a two and a half year old little toddler can bring you way down.  Here is the story of my emotional journey with a two year old toddler over the past week.
IMG_2470My son loves his mommy.  Some would even dare say he is a momma’s boy, but I have not lost hope for the future when he just wants to be with daddy. (Is that selfish?) This one particular day last week he may have been a little more clingy to mommy.  Lets just s
ay thank you God it wasn’t a bath night, because I am in charge of those.  Well I help Lindsay brush Sam’s teeth but he is really not wanting anything to do with me. He keeps on saying, “Just mommy” so clearly, its like he is just twisting an emotional knife in my back, but I am a big boy and put on a smile and cry on the inside. It gets better though.  So they head into Sam’s room where he promptly shuts the door and Lindsay starts to get him dressed, but he is moving around and being a little more crazy and I hear something unique through the door.  “Sam, if you don’t settle down, I will get daddy to put you to bed.” HE ACTUALLY SETTLED DOWN, WHAT THE WHAT?!?!?!?!
There is no greater feeling as a father then to be used as a punishment and it actually calm your son down.  Lindsay and I laughed about this later that night and just talked about how much of a world of change this kid is in because she is about to pop in a couple weeks with our daughter.
IMG_3002.JPGWell, the emotional roller coaster isn’t over with.  No more then 24 hours later my wife texts me in the morning and tells me how Sam was asking for me in the morning when she went into his room to get him ready for the day.  I mean really… this kid knows how to play with my emotions. Lindsay said that she told him that “daddy is at work and that I am not there but will play with him later,” and that he got a little sad when he heard that.   They then head downstairs to the kitchen for breakfast, and this is where it gets good.  As they are sitting down and eating, something falls in the next room over, which connects the garage to the kitchen, and Sam gets this huge look of excitement and screams “Daddy’s home! Daddy’s home!”  This kid was so pumped because he thought I was home from work.  I mean it made me feel so good.
I’m telling you now, this kid is good.  I don’t even know how much worse it will be as I am sure my little baby girl will have me wrapped around her finger. This dad is in for an emotional ride. God, I love my kids.

Dad Life: Work

What Would You Do For Five Dollars

Last week I was talking to the awesome people in the logistics cube at my work, and we somehow got to talking about this pretty awesome website called Fiverr. Now I am sure many of you may have already heard about this site, but I must have missed the train on this one.  As we talked about the site, all I could think was that this is one of the coolest most creative outlets we have ever been given.
An idea popped into my head as we were talking about this site, and it just so happens that Lindsay would be gone that night.  After Lindsay had left for the night, I decided to learn a little more about the process and create a gig, which is what they call the services that people offer.  My idea was to write a handwritten letter and mail it to whomever for whomever for only $5.  Now I know my writing looks like a caveman’s, and I am sure not many, if any, people will take me up on my offering, but I thought this would be something fun to do.  Plus, who doesn’t love a little bit of snail mail (bills excluded), no matter the occasion.  Through this fun little offering, I want to allow people the chance to connect to those they care about on a more personal level, even if they don’t have the means to do it themselves at the time.
I still can’t get over the brilliance of this site.  I mean Subway sells sandwiches for $5, so why can’t the rest of us do something that we love to do for only $5.  In fact, please leave a comment and let me know what you would do, not for a Klondike bar, but for $5.