Today is the day that my little baby boy turns into a big two year old. I swear it is like magic…One moment hes bursting into this world and the next he is laughing, running around, throwing food, saying mommy and daddy, and millions of other things.
As I think back over this past year, a single thought pops into my mind, and that thought is “Have I wasted my time with my son, or have I taken full advantage of the opportunities I have been given?” Each year I think about this and luckily I can say that I have no regrets. This year has been full of going to the pool, running around at parks, dance parties, boyz weekends, bro time, and so many adventures.
Y’all, I can’t believe he is two. TWO FOR PEET’S SAKE! He is such a big boy and I love every little thing about him, from his stinky little feet to his slick and styled hair. My wife and I are the luckiest of parents and I know that we both cant wait for this next year and many more.
So, when this day comes around next year, I know I will be struck with the same thought, and just as in the past, I hope that I will have used the time that I have been given selflessly and wisely. I hope and pray that I will continue to learn how to not always be focused on the next, but instead, to be focused on the now. I am so thankful for my son, and how my interactions with him has taught me so so much.
My wife and I have been talking a lot about the memories we have with our son.
At times my wife has mentioned that she stretches herself outside her comfort zone as she goes outside in the nasty GA Summer and plays with Sam, or as she takes our son to adventourous places like the park or Catch Air. We recognize that this is a stretch we both want to take because of the impact it has on our son and the memories we are creating together.
When my wife faces her anxieties by doing these fun and adventourous activities, it is creating memories WITH our son, not memories OF our son and there is a drastic distance between with and of. We see how some people interact with their kids in a very far removed way and it breaks our heart. We know that we don’t want to look back at his life when he is 18 and headed towards college thinking, “Wow, we have a lot of memories OF our son and what he did, but no memories WITH him.”
As parents, heck, as people living life surrounded by communities, we need to be creating memories with others and not just of others.
I hope and dream that both my wife and I can look back when we are sending our son away to college and think of all the memories we had with him, and not just memories of what he did.
I am probably the worst loser in the world… nay, the universe.
I get so emotionally invested into competitoins, even of the useless variety like Mario Kart on the Nintendo Wii. Whenever I have these outbursts I always feel so dirty and horrible. I mean who really wants to see a grown man complain and gripe, because I know that I surely don’t.
In my most recent loss to my wife on the Wii, my first thought after our competition and my outbrusts were over was what would happen if I had responded in love? Now I am not suggesting that I give her a big fake highfive and false words, but what if my actions didn’t reflect my emotions? What if had I humbly said congrats, gave a kiss and even did a little playful jarring?
I am learning that love is definitely more than a feeling, it is action. It is something that I need to do more of for sure, especially after losing in any sort of competition. What I am realizing is that losing and the emotions that flow from that loss only last for a fleeting moment, BUT my actions can potentially last for a lifetime.
I know that I don’t want my son to grow up and hate playing with me or to play golf with friends and kill the fun time. Instead, I want to respond with love, the action, and temper my emotions with some positive responses.
It seems that everything I am reading, listening to, and experiencing are pointing towards one key lesson: Rest in what I am given today. Specifically, as I read the Bible I am seeing time and time again that the Isrealites are constantly being reminded of where they have come from, what there for-fathers have experienced, and that there needs have always been met.
For me, as I think back through my life and how I have been able to have some fun adventures and great experiences, I realize my needs have been met. I am reminded that my wife loves me more now then she did 5 years ago when we got married. I am reminded that I have luckily always had a job, and now we are just starting to be able to put money away for savings and future purchases.
Now our life has not always been easy. We have had moments of not knowing how we were going to pay for things or wondering if I was going to make enough money that month. We have gone through seasons of not seeing each other that much as we both had jobs with conflicting schedules. We have had some growing experiences in our relationship, but through everything, God has provided and we have had all we needed.
Life will never be easy and even making more money doesn’t take away all of lifes problems, but I can look back and see how I have never been forgotten and have always had what I needed for that day.
Recently my wife and I got together for a nice date. We went to a local place called Stockyard which has some fantastic burgers and then after that we went to Starbucks to have what turned out to be some fantastic conversations.
Over the course of the hour we talked about finances, what we would like to do with our house over the next few years as we get ready to possibly sell, and we also talked about us. I loved how the conversation kept on boiling down to the fact that we needed to be super intentional about family time.
I am looking forward to this next year and some of the things that we have planned. I am thrilled to see how we grow closer together and to grow through the hard times of saying no to some of the things that are good, but not great as it relates to us being a family.
This is going to be a great year.