These past 11 days have been rather unique. I recently had surgery on my hip… yes, I am 31 years old and had to get some work done on my right hip. Even though it was outpatient surgery it still shook things up quite a bit. I have been on crutches, unable to drive, limited in some of my functions and mobility, and have had to be far less active than I normally am. Through all of these changes and issues, my wife has been a freaking beast and has killed it.
“For better or worse, in sickness and in health.” Most of us whom are married have uttered these words, and over these past 11 days my wife has perfectly executed on them. I am blown away at her level of service and how she so deeply cared for me. She met my every need and then some. She was always there asking what I needed and offered up help and solutions to problems and wants I didn’t even know that I had
It’s in these inciting incidents, these moments of giant change, when we as people can really shine and make an impact, and that is what my wife did. It has encouraged me to take my game up to 11 and serve her not because of what she has done for me, but because she is more than worth it. When you are served and loved in this way, it only encourages you to do the same. So please let this blog not only honor my wife, but be an encouragement to you to honor those words, “For better or worse, in sickness and in health.” Let this blog be an encouragement to look around you and serve well those that are in your life.
Who is in your life that you need to serve well, and how can you live it out today?
I’m not sure about you, but if I had to choose between a toxic or healthy culture, I choose healthy everyday. The real question is, if you find yourself in a place that breeds distrust, anxiety, and broken teams, how can you counteract that and fight against that toxic culture? Today we are going to look at the third thing we need to do to start shaping and shifting the culture of where we find ourself. If you missed the first post… just click here, and if you missed the second post… click here.
We are finally at the K in the year of ASK. The K is by far the hardest yet most rewarding step in this whole process. The K stands for Keep moving forward. Keep pressing into those relationships we have been building by asking questions and commenting on what we are seeing. When we ask those questions and focus on the relationship over the opportunity, it starts to shift and shape the culture. When we comment on things we are seeing others do, those actions, if positive, get repeated or, if negative, stop happening.
The K is difficult because we want to see instant results, but real culture shifting ideas and actions don’t always happen overnight. Culture shifting ideas and actions take time. We need to constantly be pressing into those relationships we are building because we don’t know what is going on in the other persons life. We don’t know what story they are living and what is happening behind the curtain.
No matter a persons title, position, or circumstance, they have a story that needs to be heard, and the only way to do that is by living out the year or ASK.
I’m not sure about you, but if I had to choose between a toxic or healthy culture, I choose healthy everyday. The real question is, if you find yourself in a place that breeds distrust, anxiety, and broken teams, how can you counteract that and fight against that toxic culture? Today we are going to look at the second of three things that we need to do to start shaping and shifting the culture of where we find ourself. If you missed the first post… just click here.
The second thing we can do in the year of ASK that will help to shape and shift the culture of where we are is that if you See Something, Say Something. It’s as simple as that. If you see something, say something. The reason why this is so important is because what is seen is measured and what is measured is repeated.
If you want something to be repeated, or stopped, make sure you comment on it. As people, we are conditioned to respond to positive and negative feedback. We all long to be part of a community and it is this longing that makes us respond to the feedback that we get. If we are complimented or encouraged with an action we have done, we repeat it because we want that same encouraging feedback. If we are doing something wrong and called out on it, that feeling of angst or discomfort keeps us from doing that same action again.
This action of Seeing and Saying not only affects the one it is directed at, but also the others that are a part of the group. People aren’t idiots and they pick up on what is expected, praised, and belittled. They see what is working and they themselves start to repeat those actions because they long for the same feedback.
Whether you’re a leader or not, start implementing this simple idea and watch how the culture begins to change.
Don’t you fear, this is not a mushy post… or at least I don’t think it is.
There is a book by Gary Chapman called “The Five Love Languages: How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate,” and I haven’t read it… BUT in it he talks about five ways that we best receive love. We all receive love differently and we are pre-disposed to showing it in those ways.
Over the years I have come to realize that I receive love best through words of affirmation. I am a huge words person and it literally means the world to me when I get notes or letters of affirmation. In fact, the best gift my wife has and ever will get me came last year for my thirtieth birthday when she gave me a book full of letters from friends and family. With every letter tears were shed and memories were talked about. It was the freakin absolute best gift ever.
The purpose of this post is because my sister just recently gave me a card that was full of the sweetest message. It didn’t just say that she loved me but she told me about how a piece of content I created, had impacted her and clarified a way of thinking. She really is the best sis one could ask for and I have loved seeing how our relationship has grown as we have been adults.
I want to encourage those reading this to at least look at and get a general understanding of the love languages because it will impact how you interact with those around you. Knowing how the ones you love or work with best receive love / affirmation will change your relationship. When we do this, it changes the culture of our home and office for the better as it becomes a place where teamwork and help thrives.